Finding the Perfect CP

Two years ago, I was desperate for a few critique partners (CPs). I was madly in love with the novel I'd written, and didn't understand why it kept getting rejected. My feedback at the time was coming from friends and family members, some of whom were well-read in my genre and others who just liked to read. They offered suggestions and much-needed encouragement, and I was so grateful to have them in my corner.

But I realized I needed feedback from other writers--ones who had faced the same writerly issues and would be brutally honest with me. Something in my novel wasn't working and I needed practiced eyes to help me see what.

The problem was, I had no idea how to find a CP. I'd heard other writers talking about the special connection they had with their CPs and I have to admit, I was jealous. (Think, high school nobody hearing the popular girls gush over their perfect boyfriends and wondering why she didn't have one.) So I signed up for a manuscript review session with an agent at a writers' conference, thinking she held the magic key for decoding my manuscript flaws.

The agent I met with was helpful, but at the end I was still unclear as to what, exactly, I needed to do to "fix" my story. As our session ended, she asked me if I had some good CPs.

"No!" I was so glad she'd brought that up. Hopefully she could direct me to the secret society that handed out perfect CPs. "I've had trouble finding a local group." I waited for her to work her agent-y magic.

"Well," she replied instead, "you should really try to find some. I think they could help you out."

I walked away in a bit of a daze, wondering why my fifty dollars hadn't summoned a fairy godmother. I'll spare you the details of my subsequent internet stalking (ahem) research, and share with you some things I have since learned regarding the art of finding a CP.

It never hurts to ask. 
One of the first critiquing groups I found was a local writing group that met once a week and had some great reviews. Their website said they were not accepting new members, but mentioned you could submit an application in the event that a spot opened up. Their group description looked like a perfect fit for me, but because they said they were full, I moved on.

I signed up for a different group. After two meetings, I could tell it wasn't what I was looking for. Another group I joined disbanded without ever scheduling a meeting. Every time I went back to the drawing board, I saw that first group I'd looked at and wished I could join them.

In an impulsive moment of bravery, I filled out an application and hit submit. They responded quickly and asked me for a writing sample. They invited me to a meeting and, suddenly, a week later, I was in! They had been full at one time, but several members had moved and nobody remembered to take down the line stating that the group was full.

So, if you find a group you want to join, JUST ASK! The worst they can do is say 'no'. And, as a writer, if you have issues with 'no' then you have bigger problems than finding a CP.

Your CPs do not have to live in your area
Duh, right? Critiques can be emailed just as easily as they can be printed and brought to a meeting. But for some reason, it took me a long time to realize this. The fact that there was a shortage of local groups in my not-so-big town, led me to believe I'd have to go it alone until I realized I could turn to the incredibly supportive and talented online writing community.

Not all CPs are created equal
Finding a CP is a lot like dating. You have to like your CP. You have to get along well. And you have to have a certain chemistry. Finding this is not easy. When you're looking for new CPs, swap a one-chapter critique. Mention your critiquing style (do you focus on overall plot, are you a great editor, good with dialogue, etc.) and whether you tend to be brutally honest or sugar-coat your feedback. (As a side-note, I believe sugar-coating does more harm than good. You can be encouraging without being afraid to point out what's not working). It is also helpful to establish the time frame for the critique. Do you expect to swap back that same day or is anytime over the next week acceptable?

The one-chapter swap is your chance to see if you connect with the other person's writing, an important thing since you'll be reading a lot of it. Also, do you have suggestions to offer? Feedback that would improve the writing even if you like it? In your critique, make sure you mention things the author did well, in addition to things that need improvement. This is not where you give false praise. Pick out something that was really done well and mention it. Hearing what works in addition to what doesn't, helps an author when writing future scenes. And, of course, don't be afraid to point out what needs attention and offer suggestions for possible fixes.

When you receive feedback on your chapter, read through it and decide whether the notes are helpful and comprehensive enough for your liking. If you want to continue critiquing with that person, let them know. But don't hesitate to break it off if you don't think you'd be a good match. Saying something like "I don't think we'd be a good fit in the long term" is perfectly acceptable. You want CPs that will give you the type of feedback you're looking for, otherwise it will be a waste of time for both of you.

Don't shy away from CPs who write in other genres than you
I write for young adults. But my CPs write adult fantasy, sci fi, horror, and everything in between. The fact that we write in different genres enhances our appreciation of each others' work, rather than diminishing it.

Don't take on more than you can handle
For every critique you receive, be ready to give one out. Critiquing takes time. Don't take on more CPs than you can reasonably give regular critiques to just because you want more opinions on your own work. Critiquing is a partnership and you should expect to give as much as, or more than, you take. By doing so, you will build meaningful, longstanding relationships.


Here are some places to find CPs:

Meetup. Search for writing groups in your area and find one that matches what you're looking for. If you can't find one, consider starting your own. This is where I found the writing group that has helped me take my writing to the next level. They are brutally honest and I love it!

Twitter. Yes, twitter. It's a great way to connect with other writers. I found several CPs through the hashtag #CPMatch. Scrolling through the #amwriting feed is also a good place to find like-minded writers to connect with. Additionally, twitter is where I learned about contests. Which leads me to...

Contests. Participating in writing contests also puts you in touch with other writers. Your competitors make great future CPs. Contests like Pitch Madness and Pitch Wars, hosted by Brenda Drake, and The Writers Voice and Blind Speed Dating, hosted by the anonymous Cupid are just a few examples. 

How About We CP. A tumblr run by the fabulous Jessica Sinsheimer with the express purpose of making CP matches.

Writers Conferences. This is one of the best places to meet other writers. It's easy to tell if you get along with someone when meeting them in person, but you won't really know if they'll work as a CP until you swap writing samples. When you attend a conference, get out of your comfort zone and talk to other writers. Ask if they'd be interested in swapping critiques. Then trade cards and follow up. Just be prepared. It may be harder to "break up" after swapping a sample critique since you met them in person rather than online.

If you write SciFi, Fantasy, or Horror, the SFF Online Writing Workshop is a great resource.

There are tons of other ways to find CPs, but these are the ones I've used personally. There's no right way to do it, and everyone seems to have a different story. For those of you who already have one, how did you find your CP?

It's Conference Time!

I attended my first writing conference last year. I'd been holding off for awhile. They're expensive. I have a family to take care of. Etc, etc. But a year ago, I signed up to go and I'm so glad I did.

The same conference is happening again in just over a week and I can't believe it's been a whole year. Having something like a yearly conference to mark the time makes it easier to see progress. I have learned so much this past year. The interesting thing is, I can't say definitively where all my knowledge has come from.

Certainly, I learned a lot at the conference. But I've also learned from blog posts, other writers, literary agents, twitter contests, online critique partners, my once a week local writing group, books about writing, my own observations, and straight up practice. At this point, my knowledge base resembles a patchwork quilt. Beautiful, but crafted together by tons of tiny pieces that, by themselves, may be insignificant.

I could also compare what I've learned to my recipe box. Over the years, my recipe box (yes, I still use hard copies of recipes and yes, I know, someday I will curse the fact that I didn't digitize them) has been filled with recipes shared by friends, family, and strangers. My recipe box is full of memories. Every time I pull out a recipe, I remember the person who shared it with me. But now those recipes are mine as well.

My five-year-old daughter loves to help me cook and often she asks if I will give her all my recipes when she grows up. To her, those recipes are mine. The dishes I make don't remind her of my college roommate, my mother's best friend, or my husband's aunt. They remind her of me.

So it is with my writing. I've gleaned bits and pieces from so many places. Countless people I admire and respect have shared their knowledge with me. I've gathered it together in my little writing box and I love it. Each little tip adds to who I am as a writer. I know my box is nowhere close to complete. In fact, I don't believe it ever will be, because that would be the day I stop learning. And who wants to be done learning?

After the conference is over, I'll write a few posts highlighting my favorite new bits of knowledge. But for now, here's one thing that surprised me last year:

You don't need a zillion business cards.

Okay, I didn't order a zillion business cards. I ordered fifty. But they were nice ones, printed on gorgeous, thick paper with rounded corners. But as conference time approached, I got nervous. What if fifty wasn't enough? If there were a hundred people at the conference, I'd need a hundred business cards, right? I didn't want to get caught without one if someone wanted it. So I ordered another fifty and had it rushed to my house.

When I got to the conference, I was surprised to find that business cards weren't flying everywhere. In fact, I had to summon the guts to bring up the subject of exchanging business cards with the table of writers I met at breakfast. When I mentioned it, everyone sighed in relief and pulled out their own shiny-new cards. We exchanged and I was able to stay in contact with a few new writer friends. Throughout the day, I met a few more people and we all exchanged cards. But at the end of the day I'd only given away maybe twenty. Getting to know someone well enough to know you'd want to exchange cards with them takes time. And there are workshops to attend and speakers to listen to. The only way I would have needed all hundred of my business cards is if I'd gone around shaking hands with every single person in the room, stating my name, handing them a card, and then moving on. Which would have been weird.

Bring cards. But don't go overboard. 

I really enjoyed meeting other writers, even though I had to step way out of my comfort zone to do it. That was an unexpected benefit of going to the conference. I also enjoyed the keynote speaker, the workshops I attended, the panels I listened to, and the agents I met. It was an amazing day. I can't wait to see what surprises are in store for me this time!

My Favorite Cake

Writing a novel is like baking a cake. Only, it won't be done in 25-30 minutes. I don't claim superior baking skills, but I can watch Cake Boss like... well... like a boss. If you've ever watched the show where they create masterpieces out of flour and sugar, you know the process is long. And the steps have to be done in a specific order.

 

To start off, your outline is like your recipe. The guide you follow to ensure all the necessary ingredients are there. If there are problems here, your cake will fall flat.

When you pull your cake out of the oven, that's your first draft. It's beautiful, and it smells divine, but it is nowhere close to done.
 
Thus begins the revision process. Trim a bit here, add a bit there. Make sure the structure of your cake is just right.

Once the basic design is there, you revise more. You add a base layer of frosting. This is the blank canvas upon which to build your true masterpiece. 

Then comes the most important part. Also, in my opinion, the fun part: Embellishments.

Flowers, piping, sprinkles, and, if you're really good, fondant creations. Here's where you add the elements that will make your cake really shine. This is the part in your story when you add emotional cues, sensory details and shades of color in your voicing. Stuff that will put your reader in the scene and make your story come alive.










Obviously, you can't add decorations to your cake when it first comes out of the oven or while you're still crafting the recipe.

Yet this is often what I find myself trying to do.

It's easy to get hung up on making everything perfect during a first draft, but that's not the time to do it. You add this stuff in the end. They are your finishing touches. And it's impossible to add them, in the right amount and to the precise degree, right after your cake comes out of the oven.









I like to think my writing skills are slightly better than my cake-making skills. I LOVE the process of baking my literary cakes. From creating an outline and writing the first draft, to revising and embellishing, writing a novel is a thrilling process. Sure, it's a bit more time consuming than "Mix together and bake at 350 for 25-30 minutes," but the time I put into creating something amazing makes the finished product that much better.

Write Better. Change Lives.

Being a writer is hard for many reasons, but one of the biggest is that the only measure of success is whether you're published or not. But there's so much more to being a good writer than getting published. Though I'm a definite fan of working toward publication, it can't be the only goal.

If I've learned one thing as a mom, it's that self esteem has to come from within and not from some outside source. People don't typically tell you that you're doing a good job as a mom. Your kids certainly don't. And strangers only comment when you're doing a bad job. Like when your kids are screaming and hitting each other while you tear through the grocery store at record-breaking speed, because if you don't get everything on your list then you'll just have to repeat the whole nightmare again tomorrow.

So how do you keep from throwing in the towel, convinced you are a horrible parent? You watch your kids while they're sleeping. You pay attention when they're playing nice with others. You take note when they do something kind. Most of us won't get Mother-of-the-Year award (which, apparently, is a real thing--my cousin won it last year). But that doesn't mean we suck as moms.

Similarly, we can measure our growth as writers by paying attention to the little things along the way. We can take delight in a well-turned phrase. Gain confidence when a passage we've wrestled with finally comes together in an amazing way. When we open our WIP for some edits and find the tone and feel similar to that of the bestseller we were just reading. These are the moments that strengthen us. That tell us we are doing a good job, even if no one is saying it.

Just because we are still working toward publication, doesn't mean we are crap storytellers. And our goal should not be to get better just so we can get published. Our goal should be to get better so we can write stories that change people. Stories that will make them better for having read them. Stories that will offer a much needed break from the stress of real life.

To be a storyteller like this takes dedication and talent. Writing emotional, moving characters takes practice. Writing a story that changes someone is not something that can be done overnight. But if I am able to write stories like that, then I will consider myself a success regardless of where my publishing journey takes me.

My goal of being published is what drives me to become better. To learn from others who've walked the path before me. To beat my story to a bloody pulp, then pick it up and nurse it back to health until it's even better than before. But being published should never be the only measure of my success or personal worth. As with being a mom, there is so much more to consider. The intangible. The unmeasurable moments. Those are what make us great.

Can't Stay Away for Long

My writing time-out crumbled last night when a scene I'd been puzzling over suddenly began re-writing itself in my head. I couldn't bear to type it out on my phone (as I'd been doing with other lightening bolts that struck during my step back), so I flew to my laptop and opened my story for the first time in three weeks.

After working on my novel, a fairy-tale retelling of The Princess and the Pea, for six months straight, a step back was just what I needed. My break coincided perfectly with the holidays (impeccable, though accidental, planning on my part). As I took a breather to enjoy being with my family, I was surprised to find that my story stayed right where I'd left it.

Crazy, right?

Too often I feel that if I don't spend every spare second on my WIP, it will somehow leave me. Like it must be paid constant attention in order to make it real. But taking a little break from my lovely WIP has taught me that it's not going anywhere. And though I still feel compelled to finish it, I now know it's okay to come up for air. And at this point in my story (done, but not query-ready) the air was absolutely necessary.

I've gotten some great feedback from beta readers. My mind is sharp and I'm seeing things with new clarity. Plot issues I struggled with a month ago are now being worked out in my mind. Plus, reading several books during my break has given me new confidence. My book is not yet as amazing as they are, but I feel like it's within reach. I'm close.

And that's an exciting thing.

The Step Back

My story is finished. Or perhaps I should say, "finished." I've edited, proofread, added, changed, and edited again. But I know I'm not really done. My book isn't ready for querying yet. It's close, but it's not as shiny and perfect as it could be. Even though I can hardly wait for it to be shiny and perfect, I'm forcing myself to take a step back and let it all sit for awhile.

In the meantime, I'm devouring all the books I found myself starting but unable to focus on when my fingers were itching to finish telling my story. Finding a balance between time spent reading and time spent writing has always been really hard for me to do.

I love to read. From my days of reading in bed by flashlight, hidden under the covers until my eyes burned from lack of sleep, it has always been hard for me to balance a good book with all of life's other demands. (Confession: those days of reading in bed till my eyes burn may not be completely in my past. It's a good thing my husband is a heavy sleeper).

But I also love to write. I often find myself, with ideas swirling madly in my head, frantically pulling out the notepad on my phone to jot down whatever story thread has just come to me. Since my time to write is limited, I often can't bear to spend those precious hours simply reading when I could be creating instead.

So my little step back from my WIP has been great. My story is all on the page and, with all my loose ends finally tied up, I feel free. I've read several books in the few weeks since I finished my last edit. Two of my favorites are The Originals, by Cat Patrick and A Grown Up Kind of Pretty by Joshilyn Jackson. And an old favorite: The Screwtape Letters by CS Lewis.

As feedback trickles in from my beta readers, I can feel the itch to write starting up again. My fingers ache for a keyboard as new ideas surge through me at random times throughout the day. But I'm determined to complete my step back, for a number of reasons. First of all, it's Christmastime, my absolute favorite time of the year. (If you could take away the snow and the freezing temps, it would be even better!) My kids will be home from school for two weeks and I know I won't be able to fully enjoy my time with them if I'm focusing on the nitty-gritty details of improving my story. Also, I still have several more books I want to read before I dive back into my own. And lastly, in order to appreciate the full impact of my step back, I know if needs to be longer than a week or two. I need to reset my perspective so my eyes are clear when it comes time to pull my story apart and put it painfully back together again.

So here is my pledge: I will not start editing until my kids go back to school in January. If I break this pledge, may my fingers fall off one by one until I'm forced to type with the tiny stubs that remain.

Okay, perhaps that is a bit extreme. How about I just promise not to break my pledge, and we can forgo the scary consequences? Yes? Fantastic!

A Cautionary Twitter Tale

Getting on Twitter was one of the best things I've done as a writer. At the same time, it was also one of the worst. Allow me to elaborate.

After I finished with the initial draft of my first novel, a writer friend of mine suggested getting on twitter and following a select number of agents. He said they often provided links to helpful articles and tweeted about trends that any writer should be aware of. At first I didn't want to bother with it. I didn't need another online distraction or profile to update. I was told that if I got on Twitter, I really should post at least once a day.

I'm very careful not to sign on for things I don't intend to finish, so I was hesitant to jump on the Twitter bandwagon. Signing up would mean posting each day, checking in, reading other peoples' posts - time that I'd rather spend writing. But eventually, when I had a few hours of down time, I took the plunge.

In the subsequent days, I was amazed by how fast everything moved. All of a sudden, people began following me. I followed back. More people followed. I followed back. I began thinking up clever one-liners throughout the day and rushing to my laptop to post them. Every time I checked in and there were no new followers, I was disappointed.

My friend was right to recommend following certain agents. All of a sudden, I had links to articles on word count, grammar, book publishing trends, writing query letters, mistakes to avoid in the first pages of your book, and so on. The list went on and on. Soon, I would find whole hours passing without my notice as I clicked on link after link and drank up the information like one dying of thirst.

But I have young kids and my writing time is limited. I would find my children getting off the school bus before I'd even cracked open my WIP and I would be disappointed that I hadn't gotten more done.

The first time I saw a link to a writing contest, things went from bad to worse. I rushed through my edits and polished up my query letter. I agonized over my 35-word taglines and twitter pitches. I entered my first contest, feeling certain that those judging it would fall to pieces over my cleverness and invite me at once to participate.When that didn't happen, I convinced myself that I'd been the first on their waiting list and they'd had a bitter debate over accepting me. Certainly next time I would be chosen.

Through the course of the contests, I became friends with many other writers who were all slogging through the querying stage like I was. We commiserated with each other, offered encouragement, and sometimes critiqued each others' loglines.

Then I began seeing posts titled along the lines of: I got an agent!!!!!! and The blog post I've been dying to write. When I clicked on the links, dozens of gifs did happy dances while the author shared his or her success story with the world. I was happy for my new friends, feeling that my own success story was just around the corner.

But when the rejection letters continued to pile up in my inbox, I began to lose heart. Every new success story shared on Twitter was another reminder that I was not good enough. After spending several months on multiple revisions and several more months on querying, I finally shelved my first novel. I'd heard this was fairly common and that most writers needed a "practice novel" under their belt before they could do their best work. But it was still disheartening. 

For some reason, when I began work on my second novel, getting on Twitter only made me feel depressed. More contests came and went. More success stories were shared. More hopeful writers with polished manuscripts, waiting for their turn at success. Seeing these posts just made me realize how far I had to go before I had another polished manuscript. Sure, I'd gleaned some really helpful information from the articles I'd read and critique rounds I'd entered with my first novel. I felt I knew what I'd done wrong and had a better shot at getting it right the second time around. But every time I got on Twitter, I left feeling extremely discouraged and overwhelmed.

So I stopped logging on.

I've been away for a while now, working on my second novel, and I feel like my head has cleared a bit. Enough to see Twitter for what it is, and temper my expectations accordingly. There are a lot of REALLY good reasons to be on Twitter and to check in often. But one should always go in knowing what to expect. Here are some things to be aware of:


1. Being on Twitter can encourage you to submit too early, hastily pulling together your manuscript in time for a contest. Please, please, please, avoid the temptation to do this. The worst mistake a writer can make is submitting before the work is ready. A novel needs to be vetted three, four, or five plus times. You need feedback from outside, impartial sources who aren't afraid to tell you that something stinks. Your ms needs to be ripped apart and put back together several times before you even consider submitting it or entering it into a contest. And, I have also learned, there will always be another contest.

2. Trolling twitter can lead to discouragement. Learning that agents aren't requesting what you're writing, or reading the polished first pages of other writers' novels and comparing them to your own initial draft can make the discrepancy between your own work and that of those nabbing agents seem insurmountable.

3. Twitter can be a FANTASTIC resource for writers. Where else can you eavesdrop on the conversations of agents, published authors, and newly agented writers? It's a great place to learn the ropes before jumping in and pick up some hints on what is currently working and what isn't. It's a place to make friends and find critique partners. Plus, links to articles, essays, and blog posts on thousands of subjects relevant to writers are abundant.

4. Your true colors come out when you read posts of other writers landing a book deal or signing with an agent. Jealousy battles with benevolence, and cuts you wide open so you can see clearly your flaws. Knowing yourself is a good thing. Just be prepared to make some changes if needed.

5. Twitter can be a huge time waster, enticing you to click on link after link until you find yourself perusing Pinterest with no clue how you got there. Usually, your free time is better spent writing. Rather than checking in with Twitter at the beginning of the time you've set aside for writing, check in at end, when you only have fifteen minutes left before another obligation will force you away from the computer.


It takes self-discipline and self-awareness to enjoy the benefits of Twitter without the complications, but if you can use it for the resource that it is without letting it distract or discourage you, there are a lot of perks to be had. So jump in, the Twater's warm.